Dog Days Dumbassery


I am awake only because my neighbor’s car alarm keeps going off.

I was taking pictures of my daughters. A stranger thought I was exploiting them.

The story of a white guy who gets PTSD from being racially profiled as a pervy old white guy by a total stranger.

In First for Court, Woman Is Ruled Eligible for Asylum in U.S. on Basis of Domestic Abuse

What happens when she reconciles with her husband after she is granted permanent residency? Nobody would abuse that law, would they?

Ferguson isn’t about black rage against cops. It’s white rage against progress.

Lolwut? A free drink to the first person to correctly guess the author’s race and profession.

Michael Sam is cut by Rams, falling short in setting NFL milestone

It turns out he wasn’t the gay Jackie Robinson after all.

Last but not least:

That fucking car alarm is still going off.

About Myiq2xu - BA, JD, FJB

I was born and raised in a different country - America. I don't know what this place is.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

72 Responses to Dog Days Dumbassery

  1. 1539days says:

    What’s the most annoying sound in the world?

  2. Somebody says:

    So did the car alarm ever stop? Did somebody break into the car? Did you call your neighbors and ask them to turn off their car alarm?

  3. Somebody says:

    Crap getting old sucks. I just noticed something under the kitchen table that I thought was crumbs left from the chocolate muffin my grandchild had on Friday. I wondered how in the devil my husband missed a big clump of chocolate like that yesterday when he vacuumed and mopped. I was annoyed with him, thinking he was employing the klown man strategy of screwing things up.

    I get down on my hands and knees and crawl under the table with a napkin to pick up the blob of crumbs my husband so thoughtlessly left there. Once I got under there I realized it was a giant spider, OMFG! It starts to come at me, holy crap. I’m old I can’t get out from under the table fast enough. Lucky for me, my husband came to my rescue and killed the spider……I take back the thoughts I had about him not cleaning the floors properly.

    If I had the eyesight I used to have or if I was wearing my glasses I most likely would have been able to discern it was a spider and not a clump of crumbs. If I was younger I would have gotten out from under that table in 3 seconds flat……getting old sucks. I hope I don’t mistake a snake for a power cord or something, sheesh.

    • piper says:

      2 things I miss the most now that I’m officially old – sight and speed.

    • mothy67 says:

      I hate needing readers. I can never find them when I need them. I went to cook Chef Boyardee while camping. Impossible to read. Iwas in a trailer in the middle of no where so. I had to wing it. Longest minute and a half of my life.

    • leslie says:

      I know all about eyesight and speed. I used to have them both. Now they are a fond and distant memory. Yesterday I was cleaning out the microwave of crumbs and found one of what I thought were “crumbs” alive AFTER having used the oven! I don’t know what it mutated into, but it flew out as I was wiping up those “crumbs”.

      BTW: my TCH window closes every time I hit enter on the wordpress login page. It still doesn’t believe I am who I say I am. 😦

    • catarina says:

      I reached under my desk once to grab one of those furry toy mice my cats love so much. Grabbed it by the tail and then realized it was no toy. Rigor Mortis Mouse and I touched it!! F*ck!

  4. piper says:

    The left and its torturous ideology. Amazing that Greece is finally recovering after moving away from the left’s ideology and practices. Good article.

  5. mothy67 says:

    I wish people would ask before buying kids gifts. Pup will be 8 tomorrow and she just got a huge bag filled with Monster High stuff. 200 hundred dollars wasted. There is no way she will ever wear that stuff. All she wants is a print of Starry Starry Night. I don’t think she knows about the ear but she did tell me he struggled with his pain and through it he created beauty. Ihad to beat her repeatedly and make her watch Barney.
    Seriously why not just put money in college fund.

    • votermom says:

      I always put a gift receipt in with kids gift for that reason – sometimes its the wrong choice.
      Happy birthday to your little one!

    • Somebody says:

      Well how about a little perspective from another viewpoint. Although usually their grandparents remember their birthdays, my children’s aunts and uncles rarely remember their birthday. If the aunts and uncles do acknowledge their birthday it is usually months after the fact and usually just a card. If they treated all their nieces and nephews the same then that would be fine, but they don’t it’s only my kids that get ignored. I don’t reciprocate in kind, because it’s not the children’s fault and two wrongs don’t make a right, but it bugs the hell out of me.

      I’d be thrilled if my kids were given a bag of anything for their birthday, whether it was something they wanted or not. My kids themselves would be thrilled too, the few times they got cards were special to them. I remember when my youngest was diagnosed with cancer just after her 7th birthday. Her initial reaction to the diagnosis was to assume she was dying, it took a lot of talking to convince her she wasn’t going to die. Flash forward a couple of days and her hospital room is suddenly showered with belated birthday gifts from relatives. She flat out accused me of lying to her and insisted she must be dying because they all remembered her birthday…….out the mouths of babes!

      So be happy your little one is loved and remembered on her birthday. If it’s something she doesn’t want then look upon it as a life lesson and a learning opportunity in graciousness and discretion. Above all though thank your lucky stars that you and your child are so blesssed to be showered with gifts.

      • mothy67 says:

        Thank you for the perspective. I forget sometimes that I am older and financially I can do a lot of things other people cannot. I have an apartment in my parent’s basement. It used to be a garage. Cost a little less than 5 thousand but added 20 to the value of the home. I pay no rent or utilities. I cover brat’ s stuff which comes to a little over 600/month. My parents are her great grandparents. No way we could do it without each other. I sure as hell could not handle the morning clothes ritual on my own.
        I went without a lot as a kid(food, plumbing, shoes — for real we had lost another home to foreclosure and we would hang out all day in the park my shoes fell into the creek and I had to wait two weeks to get a new pair we always had books though)
        I never want her to feel the shame I did. I go to far at times but so do all of my friends. She is in 3rd grade and has a Prada a Hermes and a Gucchi bag. I would never spend that on a purse. Stupid. Gifts.. I will go to the poor house making her think. She loves Starry Starry Night. Fine we are on our way to MOMA so she can see the original.
        You can get lost and say stupid shit to kids. I buy Sylvan learning books and 7 to 8 is homework time. Evan during the summer. School doesn’t send enough well we have plenty. She didn’t want to study the other day and she said it was the third day of school. She was yelling I yelled back fine drop out now and become a waitress.
        We walked away from each other in rage. Later smartly pants told me there was no shame in being a waitress and I was childish telling her to quit school in 3rd grade. Wish I could deny but I actually said that. I waited tables and tended bar for years.

    • leslie says:

      Happy Birthday to your little girl.

  6. SHV says:

    ” it was a giant spider, OMFG! It starts to come at me, holy crap. I’m old I can’t get out from under the table fast enough. ”
    Reminds me of a “funny” story. A few years ago, my then 76 yo sister had been outside pulling weeds. Came in to get a drink and pee. When she sat on the toilet, a snake came out of the toilet bowl between her legs.

    • mcnorman says:

      NOOOOOOOO…that is beyond nightmare.

    • Somebody says:

      Seriously? That really happened? I always thought that kind of stuff was an urban legend. OMG, all the lights are getting turned on for my middle of the night bathroom run!

      • leslie says:

        I am laughing out loud as I think back on the time, when I was a little girl staying with my grandmother. I was told I had to be quiet when using the toilet during the night as the bathroom was just outside mu granny’s bedroom. So I crept past her room, sat on the toilet without turning on the light and peed. I was just able to reach the floor with my tiptoes when seated on the “throne”, and I was swinging my legs, when snap ! something bit my toe HARD and I SCREAMED and woke up everyone in the house – including Granny. I had caught my toe in a mousetrap that I didn’t know existed. OMG!!!
        I was scared stiff until my aunts turned on the lights and found me with my big toe in the trap!. I laugh now, but I can’t tell you what that was like when I was 8 years old.

        • Somebody says:

          Awe poor thing you were probably scared to death. I bet your toe took a beating too.

          I once had a cat in my toilet, but I was an adult and it was broad daylight. The stupid cat had just fallen in there but as I began to urinate he found the will and power to leap out between my legs. In the process he about gave me a heart attack, I’m sure he was scarred for life too. He literally lept onto the opposing wall and ran sideways down that wall for a good 5 or 6 feet. Then he hid under my bed for the rest of the day, every once in awhile making a terrbile wail.

        • Lulu says:

          My grandparent’s house was out in the country. Waaaayyyyy out in the country. At night it was pitch black. No nightlights. My aunt and uncle were visiting them, and a bunch of grandchildren, so people were sleeping all over the house. The little kids, me and cousins, were on a pallet in the floor of the dining room next to my grandparent’s room. We woke up with a horrible noise coming from the front of the house. Then the horrible noise was in the next room too! My cousins decided that I, a five year old, had to go get my grandmother to kill whatever it was before it ate us. I sneaked in, poked her, jumped in bed with her, and told her there were LIONS in the house! We have to shoot them! She turned on the light, yelled at my grandfather to stop snoring, then hit the wall and told my uncle to stop too. She told everyone that story for the rest of her life.

    • catarina says:

      Totally trumps my dead mouse story.
      Utterly horrific and if it happened to me I’d never go outside OR pee- ever again.

      • The Klown says:

        Years ago I turned on the dryer in my garage and there was this horrible noise and then a pissed off possum came running out of the flexible vent pipe. Scared the holy fuck out of me.

        Right then and there I declared war on possums.

        • catarina says:

          I once saw a white possum with glowing, beady eyes.
          The thing was hanging from the rafters of a very creepy Boston parking garage.
          At 3 a.m.
          Did I mention I was alone in a scary, deserted parking garage?

        • elliesmom says:

          We have a possum that crawls up on the porch furniture and stares in the window at us.

          • Somebody says:

            We recently had a possum come up on our back porch chasing after a little tiny bunny. We ran the possum off, but it took a little bit because it wasn’t really all that afraid of us and we were sitting right there with the lights on and everything. Right now we have two baby possums that appear to be orphaned roaming around at night and trying to knock the seed out of our bird feeder.

          • Somebody says:

            Bar none the worst critter I ever ran across was the cougar in my garage (not the car, the actual animal). The feds released a bunch of cougars hoping that they would mate with the Florida panther, the program didn’t work all that well and the cougars were eventually removed.

            Several of the cougars had to be caught and relocated, some were repeat offenders and that was the case with the one in my garage. He was caught and re-released in different areas 5 or 6 times before they gave up on him. Everytime he became a nuisance getting into dumpsters and trash cans. I guess you could say he was more of an urban cougar he didn’t like hunting and fending for himself.

            I thought it was the neighbor’s cat initially when I heard something in the trash cans. I was outside sweeping so I took my broom and headed to the service door of my garage where the trash cans were. Then as I approached I heard growling and thought uh oh, must be the pit bull from down the street. Imagine my surprise when a flipping cougar came leaping out. It paused briefly and looked at me with those wild eyes. I immediately emptied my bladder, I was that scared, I thought I was dead. It just looked at me and then made a couple of leaps and disappeared into the woods across the street.

          • The Klown says:

            Many years ago I had a scary and exciting experience with a cougar. I was 17 and I almost wet my pants too.

  7. The Klown says:

    Apparently our embassy in Tripoli was sacked today.

  8. Somebody says:

    Question for Klown or any of TCHer’s with blogs. Where do you get your images of Obama? Most of the images I’ve found are copyrighted. Is there a source somewhere for non-copyrighted images? The official WH pictures are all copyrighted, which is bullshit. My husband is working on something and he’s looking for some non-copyrighted images.

    • elliesmom says:

      If the White House photos are taken at the taxpayers expense, then they belong to you. Just like you can use photos from NASA anytime you like. You should credit the White House photographer out of courtesy.
      “A United States government work is prepared by an officer or employee of the United States government as part of that person’s official duties.
      It is not subject to copyright in the United States and there are no copyright restrictions on reproduction, derivative works, distribution, performance, or display of the work. Anyone may, without restriction under U.S. copyright laws:
      reproduce the work in print or digital form;
      create derivative works;
      perform the work publicly;
      display the work;
      distribute copies or digitally transfer the work to the public by sale or other transfer of ownership, or by rental, lease, or lending.”

  9. Lulu says: “The problem then, as now in Rotherham, was a middle-class management in children’s services that simply didn’t want to know and didn’t care. The author of the Rotherham report, Prof Alexis Jay, said last week that a group of senior managers held a view that couldn’t be challenged. This despotic approach is ruining social work and failing families. Where once there was a fair representation of working-class social workers who could listen and relate to all manner of challenging families, the profession is now stuffed with textbook professionals bereft of emotional intelligence and incapable of relating to troubled kids.”

    This same mentality of detached management and “experts” is apparent with the idiots who “constructed” Obamacare, the VA failure resulting in scandal, the utter failure in foreign policy, insane immigration policy and every other catastrophic failure running through our government. This is a very good article written by someone who sees the systemic failure in the UK up close. The same thing is happening here in almost every realm of public policy and administration. He claims it is middle class management but these attitudes and indifference is aped behavior learned and copied from what they perceive to be “successful” elites.

    • 49erDweet says:

      You are spot on. There is no way this mentality did not spread down from “on high”.

      • Lulu says:

        In 2008 I saw Dems jump on the Obama wagon because they wanted to “fit” in with elites for whatever personal reason. I saw populists and old fashioned liberals convert to a hateful, nasty, condescending group think. I don’t know if it was brainwashing or a latent fascist streak and hatred for common people and I don’t give a damn which it turns out to be. But the current dominant “left” needs to be destroyed. Here is another Telegraph piece: “So what’s new? The difference today is that this shame and self-hatred now dominates Left-wing thought, whereas it was once balanced by the decent Left: who were proud to inherit the noble traditions of radical English patriotism.” It is the same here with slightly different issues currently. There is evidence that Labor started the mass immigration to stick it to conservatives and tilt the electorate. It was not for economic reasons but to fuck up the culture. Does this sound familiar to our own current immigration problems and the idiocy of progressives?

        • 49erDweet says:

          And when you say “labor” is that simply code for “communists”? Or did I jump the track?

          • Lulu says:

            I would say Labour as in the current form of the political party would parallel Progressives in the Democratic party. They are not just leftists but a very radical even fascist wing. The more moderate or traditioanlly liberal bent are bullied into or go along to get along with the radicals.

        • 49erDweet says:

          Restating it a milder way,

          Who are the morons that still give money to Obama at all these fund raisers? Do they hate Western Civilization?— Roger Simon (@rogerlsimon) August 30, 2014

        • Constance says:

          “There is evidence that Labor started the mass immigration to stick it to conservatives and tilt the electorate. It was not for economic reasons but to fuck up the culture.”

          The thing is most of the (I suspect illegal) immigrants I come into contact with have strong family values. They work hard as a family team and they respect all age groups. I would have expected a lack of respect for women but they seem to have strong respect for the position of Mother and are devoted to their daughters. They are Christians which is the dominant religion in the USA. So they aren’t really shifting the culture that much. I don’t think it is a sure thing that they will vote Democrat forever and ever either.

          Now this is probably different from what the UK is experiencing because most of their immigrants are probably Muslim. I feel Muslims degrade and control women and I have friends from the middle east who say they are Pagan (Zoroastrian) and they feel Muslims degrade and control women. Muslims also want to follow a different law. This is going to shift society. This sex slave problem in the UK is evidence of a lack of respect for women and girls and is in conflict with the dominant UK culture.

          • The Klown says:

            Jews, Hindus and Buddhists don’t have a problem with the concept of religious freedom and peaceful coexistence with other religions. The schisms between the various flavors of Christianity have rarely been an issue in America.

            Islam is the only religion that historically cannot get along with other religions.

          • Somebody says:

            I assure you Guatemalan gangbangers are real short on family values, as are the Mexican drug cartels.

          • 49erDweet says:

            But, Somebody, the Guatemalan gangbangers and Mexican drug cartels you speak of are not ipso facto political movements. They are criminal enterprises and serve only one god, MO’ MONEY. A significant difference, yes, but not one that reason, alone, will influence.

    • Constance says:

      I agree with this analysis. We can combat this to some extent by not letting the Feds take over State functions. This keeps the elitists and their dogma and political correct faith away from most states. Republicans are more for states right so right now I am leaning Republican.

  10. The Klown says:

    Andrew Klavan: How To Speak Leftist:

Comments are closed.