New Word: Douchebarrel

douchebarrel 3

I really, truly, most sincerely hope that this is the latest trend in left-wing protesting.

This is an open thread.

About Myiq2xu - BA, JD, FJB

I was born and raised in a different country - America. I don't know what this place is.
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115 Responses to New Word: Douchebarrel

  1. 49erDweet says:

    I could use two in front of my house, but only if they were to be manned (or staffed, to be gender neutral).

  2. Myiq2xu says:

  3. Myiq2xu says:

    • mothy6767 says:

      For sucks sake. I just walked in from the casino. Pretty much obliterated. Hours of poker. I was just stopping in for a minute 50 on me. I ate, tipped well and took.a cab home and I still have over 40. Knowing when to walk away is the hardest part. So I am fighting my demon to go back and I read that headline. Oh did I laugh.broke through my semi-reality of going back. Addiction is such a strange thing– I was justifying going back until I laughed at that brilliant absurd headline.

  4. DeniseVB says:

    Of course he is ….

    • elliesmom says:

      I must be clairvoyant.

    • 1539days says:

      Which Black actor has to be the token who doesn’t deserve a nomination, but gets one because of Sharpton?

    • mothy6767 says:

      I think sharpton should become a verb not a noun and he is not worthy of a gerund. A passive aggressive tendency of hearing all things through an ear wax crusted hole in the side of the head that leads to a complete and utter inability to communicate in a rational way in the English language.
      How many Hispanics or Asians have won an Oscar? Been nominated? I loathe orca but respect the fact that she at least puts her money where her mouth is. 14% of America is African American. Wanna play that game? Fine let no more nor less of every sports team be black. Local news only 14%. Make the argument that things were wrong for so long. Fine make every newscast be 40% Hispanic lesbians with a penis that are standing in line to read the news in a queue for the ladies.
      By the way if you have ever been to a Broadway show women are not shy about using the men’s room. Gender neutral bathrooms work well in the outskirts but not so much in the city. Demands of equal access have repercussions. Stuff has been tried. Women take longer in the bathroom as a rule. Maybe it is clothing. A man unzips shakes and is done. A woman may have multiple steps. I worked for a major company that had bathroom equity issues and I know women take much longer in the restroom than men. Handicapped and children only signs do not work. 75 percent of a theater audience might be female but it does not change the fact that men are in and out.

      • swanspirit says:

        Women have different anatomical structures that also function differently, and therefore requires different and sometimes more complicated care. I know this is a shock to some , but it is true, and proven by science. Also, women seem to give their hygiene more attention as well. It isn’t just clothing. 😉 /snark over
        sorry, could NOT resist 😉

        • Somebody says:

          According to studies 77% of men don’t wash their hands after they go to the bathroom. That might account for some of the time saving, but it is also true that men because of their anatomy can usually relieve themselves more quickly.

          • mothy6767 says:

            I get all that but I see no solution for a private enterprise. Men’s rooms are usually smaller and have fewer stalls already. What are you going to do as a business owner to accommodate more women? One urinal? Single occupancy does not work. The door gets locked and women still take more time. I have been in the men’s room with Cindy Adams and Liz Smith many times during intermission. They didn’t care that guys were holding their junk. They had to go and there was no line. No one complained that page 6 was watching . Maybe a third option would be better.

  5. elliesmom says:

    The head honcho of the MA State Police did a press conference today on the idiots protesting this morning. He blasted them for blocking access to the area’s level 1 trauma centers. Seems like ambulances were being diverted to a community hospital in Brockton. Not sure I’d want to go there for a hangnail.

  6. Myiq2xu says:

  7. Myiq2xu says:

  8. 49erDweet says:

    These Douchbarrels are actually easy to move out of the way. All it takes is sling chain and old-style towtruck with a rear boom. 30 seconds to back up to the barrel, 20 seconds to wrap the sling chain around the barrel half way down, 15 seconds to lift the barrel high enough for the screaming attachees to clear the ground, and drive off. The lifting wouldn’t kill them, but probably wreck their shoulder sockets. Small price, I say. Of course they’d no longer be able to salute so might be ruined for future military service.

  9. grrr…hands. but y’all knew that.

  10. Underwhelmed says:

    Y’know, as much as I loathe Sharpton and his ilk, and the rampaging hatred of the feminist left, I have to say I’m not impressed with the lack of diversity in the Oscar noms, either. There is an absolute problem with diversity in Hollywood. Small pockets are improving, but for the most part it sucks. And it’s not enough to say the chances are there, nobody can legally prevent women/non-whites from participating. When the gatekeepers are mainly white men, and everywhere you look there are actively-created barriers and hostile workplaces, of course there will be a lack of full diversity. Just because the facts are uncomfortable doesn’t make them not-facts. And just because some of the people pointing this shit out are absolute fucktards doesn’t make the shit untrue.

    • 1539days says:

      Pointing out problems is one thing, it’s when fake solutions are forced on everyone when it ruins everything. Gone Girl was recognized, but not for supporting actor Tyler Perry. The same fundamental issues exist even if a large number of AA actors got nominations one year and didn’t in another. Does the Academy tell members to vote for at least two Black actors / directors just to get the press off their back as a form of affirmative action?

    • mothy6767 says:

      I could not disagree more. The academy has no dues to pay to society. A private organization. If you do not like do not watch. I happen to think Tom Hanks is an awful actor that makes men look like drips. Julia Roberts for Erin Brockovitch? Really? It was a one sided TV MOVIE with an A lister. Only award it should have won is best special effects for what they did with Roberts’s bra. She was stacked.

    • leslie says:

      Last night I heard on the teevee that this is the first time since 1998 that a black has not been nominated in a major category. Maybe it’s because there were others who performed better. Maybe there were not enough slots (limited to 5) to put in the person with the 6th highest votes. Should they allow enough nominations just so there is a POC (black to be precise) nominated in every category? And what if the 6th highest vote-getter is not AA? And if an AA doesn’t win, then what???
      I am so tired of quotas, pandering to placate people, number counting. . . This is really not the greatest issue on earth. And right now, I’m so sick of Sharpton and his ilk that I’m glad there were no AA nominated. If he doesn’t like the roll of the dice this time (unlike the last 17 years) let him boycott the damn movies.
      Maybe I’ll boycott the Grammy’s and protest the number of Beyoncé twerks, etc.

      • mothy6767 says:

        I quit a job once because the company promoted a woman over me because I thought she was a woman. Event planner/co-ordinator for a big bank. Easy job. I would take people to drunken lunches to assure when I had a client in it took one call. I gave box seats away all the time because client didn’t want them. Easiest job in the world. I was not some trust fund kid no pedigree. Often I had to provide entertainment for family and security. I was good and never got a complaint so I thought the job was mine. I didn’t get it and I wanted to cry reverse sexism. Too bad for me I did not know she possessed the knowledge of the intricacies of the upper crust . Horse racing for me is OTB. She got the job because she spoke the language not because of genitals but I wanted to believe otherwise.

      • foxyladi14 says:

        Great idea. 🙂

    • jeffhas says:

      Funny – I don’t see many white nominees at the BET awards either…. I wonder what would happen if there was WET (as in White Entertainment Television) awards program? – marketed as WHITE entertainment? – yet BET rakes in millions with nary a white person…. Al doesn’t seem to discuss this much.

      PS: (I would secretly prefer an awards program where all the celebrities were actually WET, water and all!)

    • angienc says:

      The lack of nominations for Selma (other than next pic — a category which, not for nothing, has more slots than the others –8 instead of 5) is because Oprah and her production company failed to get their act together and send screeners out in time. Given that enough people saw it despite the shitty roll out to make top 8 (best pic) there is a good chance that there would have been nods on the acting categories if promotion had been handled better. And that’s on SELMA peeps not the Academy.
      Demanding or expecting diversity is bull-fucking-shit. Treat everyone with respect & on his/her merits.

      • Myiq2xu says:

        I’m going with the theory that it just wasn’t that good.

        • Mt.Laurel says:

          Yep. TPTB in Hollywood and the academy voters were well aware of Selma. I think they decided not to give it tops nods it did not deserve because the movie was not even good enough to be seen as mediocre nor could they use the quirky/offbeat as justification.

      • 49erDweet says:

        Movies are a business, not a social exercise. Diversity is so overrated. When I coached a youth soccer team one of my (black) players won the league POY trophy 3 years running. Some parents were unhappy because the trophy “should be spread around to other races”. But he WAS the best player. It’s like reality doesn’t count. So they went to participation trophies and folded a couple of years later due to lack of interest.

        • mothy6767 says:

          I can deal with Django Unchained or 12 Years a Slave once in awhile. I do not go to the movies to pat myself on the back. Look at me I am so liberal I watched a movie.
          GAG me. Pretentious fuck tards.
          I seldom see anything in a theater that is not rated G(. I loved the 7 up series the BBC has done a documentary of a few blokes at age seven they revisit every seven years.) So Boyhood intrigues me.
          I do not like musicals but my Aunt Maureen came to New York. Mamma Miami was a must. I hated it but for a month I was skipping and dancing to ABBA. Fun show. Into the Woods is also amazing. Streep manages to steal the show without stealing the show. It costs 80 dollars to go to the movies. Tickets(30) popcorn(10) three huge sodas (15) parking and some inane lobby game. I can wait six weeks.

          • 49erDweet says:

            Understand. We’ve gone maybe twice in 18 months. Just not that much interesting. When we holiday in London late spring we’ll go to Theater every other night for two weeks and fill up on actual acting and scripts sans social messaging. If I’m gonna be preached to, it needs to be in a church instead of a theater.

  11. HELENK3 says:

    dumb criminal of the day.
    If only he had played baseball in school

  12. Myiq2xu says:

    • leslie says:

      That’s so funny. He’s 20, she’s 45. He’s gonna be grateful she wears a burka when he’s 45 and she’s 70. lol

  13. SHV says:

    “Since the 1990s, students from Mount Holyoke College, an all-women’s school in Massachusetts, have staged an annual production of The Vagina Monologues. Not this year. The college is retiring the ritual over concerns that the play—penned by Eve Ensler in 1996 as a way to “celebrate the vagina” and women’s sexuality—is not inclusive enough.””
    And now, in the name of feminism, “female-validating talk about vaginas is now forbidden,”
    But “we can’t present a show that is blatantly transphobic,” ..
    The worrisome thing is that in 10-15 years when these special snowflakes wake up and are still un/under employed and barely scrappng by, the backlash isn’t going to be pretty.

  14. HELENK3 says:

    can we talk Iran into keeping bomber billy ayres? He is over there bashing America as usual

  15. HELENK3 says:

    from Ace of Spades

    Now, I want to make sure that my point is very, very clear, because after all I am trying to explain things to people who think that it’s smart to play in traffic. So here we go: society values beloved grandfathers over Lefty protesters. So when it’s a choice between an example of the former needing to be rushed to the hospital after a horrible car accident, and examples of the latter risking horrible car accidents, society’s default sympathy is going to be with the grandfather. And this is not casual, either: the EMTs could have gotten out of the ambulance this morning and cleared a path with their defibrillators and society would have nodded solemnly and murmured It’s a shame that it had to come to that.

    — Moe Lane on freeway protestors

    • Lulu says:

      I don’t have a problem with Sharpton demanding an Oscar for Oprah. If Affirmative Action is applied to presidential primaries and elections, due process, foreign policy, etc why not the entertainment industry which was central to the selection and election of Obama. Oprah is to entertainment what Obama is to politics. If more talented people get bumped and dumped isn’t that what Hollywood demanded in 2008. What goes around comes around. It is their turn now. Everyone else has had to be demeaned and dehumanized so take your meds see how it feels. And only minority (preferably black) movie folks should get it for the next say 10 years to make up for the decades (or centuries!) of non recognition that minorities have had to endure. And pay Al. Never forget to pay Al. Bronco wants his cut.

      • votermom says:

        Yup. Let them eat the crap cake they’ve forced on the rest of us.

        • Lulu says:

          Oscars are money. The big show, the hoopla, marketing value for Oscar nominations and big moolah for wins, future work, and REPUTATION. Take it away from them and they will scream. Tough tits. They asked for it. No sympathy do I have. Not a whit. They wanted this but were too stupid, ignorant (and they believed their own propaganda) to know it. So they can pay up in lost marketing, reputation, and bribes. Screw them.

      • DeniseVB says:

        I’m not sure why Al’s so upset, Selma did get a nod for Best Picture. That happens all the time (actors, directors dissed), so what’s his problem ? From what I read about the movie, there were “controversies” with historical facts kinda twisted for the MLK and LBJ characters. Could have just been a tough competition year too. There’s always groups with the sads after the noms … then the wins upset even more people, never forget the year Shakespeare in Love defeated Saving Private Ryan (at least my husband hasn’t) 😉

        The Academy needs to shake it up a do what the Golden Globes does, divide the the categories into Dramatic movies, actors, directors and Musical/Comedy movies, actors, directors….etc. THEN EVERYBODY GETS A TROPHY ! 😉

        Or let Al start his own awards show …. black only….and he can give out Sharpies.

    • swanspirit says:

      So now it is the function of the White House to award movies? Obama is off the rails.

  16. votermom says:


    • Lulu says:

      Al wants some “go away” money. Shouldn’t he be investigated for extortion and bribe taking? Is Giuliani too old to do one more RICO investigation and trial?

    • DeniseVB says:

      I just noticed on WHD, Obama’s schedule has “screening of Selma with the cast” in his “home theater” at 5:30pm today.

      • leslie says:

        Well, that’s totally better than an Oscar! they can each have recordings of all his best speeches to take home with them along with a miniature bust of Churchill.

        • Mt.Laurel says:

          BOO sent the bust back but maybe they can get those more of those nifty plastic planes and the DVD movie set they picked up at the WH shop at the last minute as gifts to the PM and his family.

          And some of MO’s special preserves that she claims she made herself from her garden

  17. mothy6767 says:

    I know I am exhibiting unsavory opinion y but I must say i know the calotically challenged girls with arms stuck in cement. They are fat white girls that no one paid attention to. Became an easy fuck for the unemployed entitled black youth. Will do anything. This script has been written
    Tubby white chick gets knocked up loses her family because she beds a thug not because of his skin color but because he is a borderline pimples. She only sees color and ends up with a few kids and no future and he moves on. Agree or disagree I have seen it. A young fat chick alone needing human touch. Easy prey.n

    • votermom says:

      Yup. Chubby chicks are easy prey for predators for that reason – low self-esteem.

      • mothy6767 says:

        Imagine the conversation.
        “Baby I love you. No one loves you like me. All you gotta do is cement your arm in a barrell and then sit in traffic for me I hurt baby so bad the whole world has been unfair to me. If you love me you will do this.”
        I would lay money that those girls have an emotionally abusive partner. All things come back to him. She is so unworthy the only thing that matters is making him feel worthwhile. No real man would stand by and let his other available to such danger. Call me what ever you want. Sexist for saying real man. I give not a Shit. Men and women are different and all the graduate courses in the world will not change that.
        I am gay but I admit I have an instinct that drives me to nurture. That does not make me more or less masculine. I have experience and a responsibility to be honest. Little girl breaking boards with her foot or palm is an extension of what I have learned I know I cannot shield but I pray my baby will be armed with above all self knowledge.

  18. mothy6767 says:

    I have never been behind the wheel of a car(i didn’t learn as a kid so I didn’t have to date part of my master plan to hide being gay) Now it just scares me. Anywho I take a lot of buses and I hear first-hand the excuses. the mentality. It is the white man’s fault that you cannot use your iPhone on the free network. Somehow it is racist to get 600 free minutes. I was going to buy my crud ann iPhone for Christmas without a contract they cost 800 dollars. How do you spend that money on a phone and then jump to racism because it can not be used for free?
    I have FIOS triple play for 139 if you have a kid that gets reduced lunch internet is 9.99/month. Get hulu or netflix and a free phone you are saving at least 110 a month.

    • Somebody says:

      Surely you’ve driven a go-kart? If you haven’t then you need to put that on your bucket list. Take your daughter the two of you will have lots of fun!

  19. mothy6767 says:

    By the way Bradley Cooper is top notch in American Sniper. Who knew the boy from Wet Hot American Summer had it in him.

    • DeniseVB says:

      Now that was a surprise ! Both for the movie and Cooper. Liberals just Hatey-hate that movie….about a bigoted murderer. Heh.

    • Somebody says:

      So have you two seen American Sniper? It’s not playing near me, not until this weekend. I’d have to drive about 50 miles to see it otherwise. I’m hoping to catch it this weekend or next, but I worry that Hollywood ruined it, you know put some liberal spin on it. I’m hoping not since it’s a Clint Eastwood film.

      So anybody that has seen it do tell, what’s your opinion?

      • mothy6767 says:

        I have a friend that got one of those “for your consideration” copies. I really liked it but I like Eastwood . He lets the story tell itself gimmick free. You can dislike the man but I find him a tremendous director.

    • Underwhelmed says:

      Anyone who watched him in Alias!

  20. DeniseVB says:

    Rotten Tomatoes has a list of the winners from the many awards handed out already … there’s definitely a trend towards the Oscar noms. There are just too many award shows, funny Al didn’t go after them? Not high profile enough ?

  21. piper says:

    Following Helen’s lead in sharing from a commentator on no quarter

  22. mothy6767 says:

    Heloise Hints
    I have to to go to a friend’s mother’s funeral today. I don’t/didn’t know her so it is just a courtesy stop.(at 48 I am the only one of my friends that still has both parents, gives some perspective. Yeah we beed po when they were teens with three kids but I still have them. I’d choose poor)
    So I get out my suit and my top coat. Wool covered in dog hair. Tried scotch tape. No good. But then I used the vacuum cleaner nozzle. Worked like a charm. Of course I then checked viewing hours online and they are doing immediate family only. So I am clad to mourn and nowhere to go. By the way cuff links are stupid. Pain in the arsenal.

  23. I think after the John Kerry/James Taylor “parade” in Paris, we can go back to using the more familiar “douchebag”

  24. mothy6767 says:

    Benevolent feeling secure — my key broke in front door. I was only taking out trash so I did not have a phone or a jacket. I would take hypothermia and frostbite over asking Gladys Kravitz to use her phone. So being a dumb guy I body slammed it. No I did not knock down the door but I cracked the frame and I was able to get a garden tool and open the door. I was feeling real macho until I realized I had to go into the attached gatage(my apartment) to get the tool and that the stairway was unlocked. Beyond that I could have crawled through the doggy doors. Confess it did feel good to body slam the door and I will hear nothing of the frame was 75 years old. The story is there were kittens and babies inside no fire worse the View came on and I had to save them from Rosie and Whoopie. Society owes me a debt.

    • Myiq2xu says:

      Tell people the Obamacare police busted down your door because you didn’t sign up.

      • mothy6767 says:

        I get emails everyday and phone calls from Let’s Get Covered. I would be looking at a 5,000 dollar deductible to live in misery. I had open heart surgery in 1970 so I am not a candidate for transplant but I can still be billed. I had eleven periocentisis events. Three says you are dying and soon. Pardon the pun but I had colonoscopies up the whazoo endoscopic, and biopsies. Two years on the 19th I am med free and still alive.
        I think most doctors and nurses are brilliant but you have to be aware when you get care. My belly would swell up like a pregnant lady and I would be drained. Washboard abs today at 48(almost). Unheard of that someone lives with that many exterior pipes. I did.according to my anesthesiologist I also have the oldest prosthetics. My valves are pig and they are 44 years old. Oldest he says is 10.

  25. Myiq2xu says:

    I woke up to go pee but it was still too early to feed the kitties so I closed my bedroom door and went back to sleep. Then I enjoyed 3 1/2 hours of glorious, continuous sleep!

    Now I’m eating breakfast while the beasts are feeding.

    • Somebody says:

      Glad you got some solid sleep. That’s usually not a problem for me, but it is right now while using these nicotine patches and damn the dreams. I’ve had some bizarre ones, but they all have the same theme, everybody is leaving me and I can’t catch up, hmmm.

      Enjoy your breakfast, I’m sure the kitties are happy to have theirs. I have my granddaughter today…..should have thought that through with the quitting smoking thing. We took her to the circus last night to see your brethren. I got a clown nose with my program! It squeaks too!

    • Myiq2xu says:

      The kitties are fed and sleeping. The Klown is fed and sleepy.

  26. foxyladi14 says:


  27. HELENK3 says:

    stolen from a No Quarter commenter

  28. HELENK3 says:

    Demonstrators force Montgomery BART Station closure after banging spoons on trains in Martin Luther King Jr. weekend protest – @VivianHo

    playing around trains can get you killed

  29. HELENK3 says:

    this has to be one of the dumbest things ever to protest.

  30. HELENK3 says:

    used to be when you were unemployed , you went looking for a job of any kind. now it seems you go a protest whatever is the current fad

  31. Somebody says:

    John Kerry is a douchebarrel, OMG I can’t believe our SOS did this
    That asshole doesn’t have a diplomatic bone in his body. I don’t think there is anyone in this administration that understands diplomacy or protocol. When will this national nightmare be over?

  32. HELENK3 says:

    NCAA announces deal to restore vacated wins for Penn State, late coach Joe Paterno – @ESPN

  33. mothy6767 says:

    “I Lost Thetsday” was a running joke for me for years . I never thought a need to own it. nor even very bright one day a guy said to me I don’t remember what I did last night and I said I lost Thursday. Somehow that became funny. 1992 I said that dumb statement. Get a call today we want to use it as our film company name. I okay. Three words I had never used in a professional manner. Young owner called me not an attorney. I said to him in the future you might want to have lawyers do this. He said I know but my Aunt made me call she said you said kissing her was like drowning in chocolate pudding. Amazing beautiful woman that I fooled around with on the docks near 72nd street. We were friends after that but 30 years later for f her son to call me about a dumb phrase. I did the math no way he is my son. I asked to speak with his mom he gave me her number. . She just laughed said her boys were at NY U and wanted a name and she thought of me.I think it is funny that a black man. Is naming his production company after his mother’s gay white boyfriend.

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