Satire Is Officially Dead

You just can’t make this shit up.

Remember Eliot Spitzer-Swallows? He was the Democrat governor of New York. He was also known as the “Luv Guv” and “Emperors Club VIP Client #9.” He resigned when he got caught with his fingers in the nookie jar. His scumbaggery pales in comparison to Anthony Weiner, but he is just one of many, many Democrats with penis-management issues.

Today he made a surprise appearance at court.

But wait! There’s more! This is from last November:

Spitzer’s Leash Fetish Revealed

Disgraced “Luv Gov” Eliot Spitzer likes to take long romantic walks — at the end of a leash, new court papers claim.

The hooker-happy former governor’s fetishes include a penchant for paying “young girls” to lead him around “on all fours” like a dog — and use kinky sex toys on him, former escort Svetlana Travis Zakharova alleged.

Zhakharova, who last month struck a misdemeanor plea bargain after being charged with extorting $400,000 from Spitzer, filed the stunningly revealing papers in Manhattan Supreme Court, seeking to lift a gag order imposed as part of her prosecution.

The 27-year-old Russian native says she has a First Amendment right to “discuss any and all actions or events that she participated in with Spitzer.”

“Moreover, the fact that Spitzer was paying young girls to insert sex toys into his anal cavity and walk him around the floor on all fours with a leash is conduct that he made a conscious choice to engage in,” wrote her lawyer, Joseph Murray.

This is why Democrats are the “Party of Feminism.”


About Myiq2xu™

Being an asshole is all part of my manly essence.
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119 Responses to Satire Is Officially Dead

  1. Myiq2xu™ says:

    • Ann says:

      • Lulu says:

        LOL. The federal judge in this matter is one that was rejected for the Supremes because of an illegal alien nanny problem (and a homewrecker named in a huge divorce as an adulterer with an old rich guy she later married) during the Clinton administration so she’s an upstanding moral sort herself. If it weren’t for hypocristy Dems wouldn’t have anything to do.

        • taw46 says:

          I went to twitter about 30 min ago, saw MediaMatters had alerted their troops and sent out the list of advertisers so the crazies could start their boycott of Hannity. Trying to find out what this was all about, they said it was because he shared the same lawyer as Trump. Then I saw the statement from Hannity that he had never retained him, but had talked to him about some matters to get his input and perspective. Then I saw where people said either Hannity or Cohen was lying. Then people said Cohen is really Hannity’s lawyer, and Hannity also paid someone to have an abortion. Or he was in on the Russian collusion. Or he plotted for Trump. I need a road map to keep up with the outrage of the day. The insanity is too much for me to follow.

          • DeniseVB says:

            Yep, that’s why I had to leave the Dems, it just got to be so mentally and physically exhausting to stay in a constant state of rage, stomping my feet and flailing my arms over stupid sh*t. I remember one instance when Kerry was running, there was a demanding push for GWB to release his military records while Kerry was being “swiftboated”. I asked for help with talking points in response to why Kerry wouldn’t release his records. I was told to “Believe” Kerry really did earn those purple hearts. Huh? Wut? Where are the citations? No response.

  2. Myiq2xu™ says:

  3. DeniseVB says:

    I’ll just leave this here: 2018 Pulitizer Prize Winnahs !

  4. Myiq2xu™ says:

  5. Myiq2xu™ says:

  6. Myiq2xu™ says:

    • DeniseVB says:

      My response:

  7. Myiq2xu™ says:

    • lyn says:

      I agree that Democrats attract sociopaths, and the media overflows with them.

      • DeniseVB says:

        I was sad to see the New Yorker, NYT and WaPo raking in the Pulitizers, which will encourage them to be more rabid against Trump and his rube supporters.

        • lyn says:

          All prestigious awards have been diluted with progressive shit. Thank Obama!

          • DeniseVB says:

            Obama managed to ruin the Nobel and Profiles in Courage awards. The latter was probably a trade off to give Princess Caroline of Kennedy a cushy Ambassador appointment to Japan.

    • DeniseVB says:

      Has anyone asked the “End of Trumpers” what’s next after they get rid of him? Do they know Hillary will never be president?

  8. votermom says:

    on that chik fil a new yorker article, surprisingly bate silver gets it

  9. Myiq2xu™ says:

  10. Dora says:

    Rep Lee Zeldin (R-NY) just announced he will be leading a Special Order on the House Floor Monday night at 7 PM EST detailing a case for a second Special Counsel to be appointed to investigate Obama’s FISA abuse.

    Zeldin also wants to know how/why the Clinton probe ended and how/why the Trump-Russia investigation began.

  11. 1539days says:

    Sean Hannity supposedly paid Michael Cohen about $10 to establish attorney-client privilege. To the lawyers here, is that a real thing? Can you literally give a lawyer a dollar and you’re technically a client?

    • Myiq2xu™ says:

      Yes. But you don’t need the dollar. All you have to do is consult.

      • Lulu says:

        The idea that every lawyer that is consulted on any level about anything must be exposed in legal proceeding even if it is not germaine to anything is horrifying. How are people supposed to get legal information or advice for anything like a will or real estate or a trust much less a divorce, adoption, etc. As usual the Dems backing this mess have no concept or concern for cause/effect just like they showed for ME TOO! disaster for working women. Dumb pieces of shit.

  12. taw46 says:

  13. Myiq2xu™ says:

  14. Myiq2xu™ says:

  15. Myiq2xu™ says:

  16. Somebody says:

    I just don’t get it, honestly I don’t. What business is it of ours if Sean Hannity did or did not hire Cohen to be his attorney? Is it illegal to hire an attorney now?? Is it illegal to be friends with one now?

    I also don’t care if DJT screwed Stormy Daniels a decade ago when he was a private citizen. I don’t get why anybody else cares, he’s never claimed to be a saint. I certainly didn’t think he was a saint when I voted for him, in fact I seem to remember him screwing around quite publicly on his first wife. I’m pretty sure we all knew of that part of his past and we voted for him anyway. It isn’t illegal to have an affair, it isn’t even illegal to pay someone to sign a NDA…….so who the fuck cares???

    I honestly didn’t care about WJC and Monica, but that was in the WH and he was her boss. Stormy didn’t work for DJT, they are both well over 21, they were both private citizens at the time. Whatever did or did not happen is simply none of our business. I am just flabbergasted at all of this. I’m shocked about the raid, I’m shocked the media finds this newsworthy, the whole thing is ridiculous.

    This morning I had a flock of Canadian geese land on my roof, then a couple of randy geese decided to join them and try to mate with some of females. OMG the noise, it literally woke my daughter up. We laughed and decided goose fucking is our new fun term to be applied to any group that runs about aimlessly, squawks and just makes a lot of useless noise in general. So in keeping with that………The resistance is nothing but a bunch of goose fuckers…….The special counsel and many in the DOJ and FBI are goose fuckers too……James Comey is a goose fucker!

    • taw46 says:

      I like that, goose fuckers! Lol.

    • SHV says:

      Canada Geese are monogamous, usually paired for life; maybe that’s why they are always squaking at each other!!

    • Cisco says:

      I’d like to use that now and then, ok.
      “Goose fucking”

      • Somebody says:

        Go for it. If you could have been here you’d agree, all that squawking and flailing about. As I looked on, I kept thinking of democrats LMAO!

    • helenk3 says:

      the name is perfect for them

    • Ann says:

      I went into the Wild Bird store this morning to buy a hummingbird feeder. Hubby (who was with me) asked the clerk for poison-goose-feed. She laughed and said they get that request a lot.

      (no, they didn’t have any – booooooo)

    • swanspirit says:

      That is hilarious!! We have local geese that live in our single family swamp development, they get priority for crossing the streets; they raise their young here, and they seem far and happy. The big inside joke of the people who live here, is that ” The geese migrate, from North Ocean Pines, to South Ocean Pines, whenever they feel like it”
      I know, you had to be there. 😎

      • dm says:

        A friend of mine said several years ago, some town on the eastern shore decided they liked the geese hanging out for the tourists in the park so they clipped their wings to make them stay. The problem with that is apparently when the young ones arrived, there weren’t any adults capable of flying and showing them the way home…then the town, of course, ended up with way too many geese…not sure if that story is true or not, but it sounds like something stupid humans would do.

    • Underwhelmed says:

      Everything’s illegal and immoral if you’re on the right side of the aisle. Didn’t you get the memo? /s

    • Underwhelmed says:

      And it’s not newsworthy. It’s ammunition worthy because the aim is to destroy Trump and his supporters. If this was about one their people it would be a nothing burger. That’s why they’re the Despicables. They have no ethics, no moral compass, no comprehension of their evil.

  17. Somebody says:

    I had a nature kind of morning. Prior to the geese arrival, I noticed a large bird high up on a pine branch. The sun was just rising so it was hard to tell exactly what it was. I grabbed my phone and snapped a ton of pictures. That thing sat there for 20 minutes or more. I finally had to come inside and get my day started, when I went back out about 30 minutes later he was gone.

    I finally got a chance to review the pictures and make comparisons to images online. My greatest fears were realized, it’s a bald eagle. Best I can tell it’s approximately 4 years old, maybe 3. It’s still mottled, but has a white head and some, but not all of its white tail feathers.

    This weekend we had a strong line of storms and high winds move through. The winds took down additional trees behind my house that were weakened by the hurricane. Hubby and I noticed with more trees cleared out, off the back corner of our house not too deep into the woods there was a huge nest in a tree. We wondered what kind of nest it might be and feared it was a bird of prey’s nest…….well shit, guess it is. So now we’ll have a whole family of eagles to hunt our puppies.

    I don’t think silly stuff like plastic owls will deter an eagle. I don’t feel comfortable letting the puppies even go out and play in their sandbox. The sandbox sits next to the house and I’m right there but I’m on the lanai and a bird wouldn’t see me, but could see them……so until I come up with a roof or netting they will have to stay in the house unless they are on a leash. I just hope it won’t try to take them on the leash.

  18. helenk3 says:

    we live in interesting times
    Mueller and McCabe both higher up in the FBI help Hillary sell uranium to the Russians. this is not in the best interest of our national security.
    Comey gets fired for being the clinton’s piss boy and leaking classified info to a friend (who now claims to be his lawyer) to give to the press. Writes a book, gets a lot of air time to spew nonsense about his morality. he makes me think of those oh so moral beings that when you are around them put on a flak jacket and hold your wallet.
    Mueller has screwed up many investigations during his career and becomes head of the FBI.
    stormy has a really high paying one night stand, signs a paper and gets paid to keep quiet and now wants a bigger payout. the msm act like she is a madonna instead of a hooker
    An elected president who is trying to stand for the country has more inside enemies than the country does outside enemies. When you have citizens whose hatred of him outweighs their loyalty to the country we have real problems.
    Today on tv I heard a retired prosecutor say that he has had lawyers offices raided many time. so much for lawyer – client privilege guess that is just a myth today
    A former first lady and secretary of state fails to keep classified information safe, gets an ambassador killed along with three other heroes and gets a pass from the msm and the legal system in this country.

    I love this country. We have a hell of a lot messes to clean up and DC is a big one, every branch of government is tainted. Congress has become the well paid country club that does more harm then good. Our legal system just sucks. The executive branch is under siege and is being crippled by BS.

  19. Myiq2xu™ says:

    It just hailed. It looks like it snowed outside.

  20. helenk3 says:

    I belong to a group called bookbub. You can get books for your e-reader either free or at a low price. today they have one called Crazy Horse and Custer by Steven Ambrose. It just looked interesting. about their lives I ordered it have not read it yet

  21. Myiq2xu™ says:

  22. votermom says:

    No wonder

    Federal Judge Who Rejected Trump’s Request For a Restraining Order Over Materials Seized in FBI Raid Officiated George Soros’ Wedding

  23. votermom says:

    hubby is watching Silicon Valley, and in this ep Richard discovers that outing someone as a Christian in SV is the worst thing ever.
    Even if the guy is gay.

    it’s funny how subversive this show is considering that it’s an hbo show

  24. Dora says:

  25. Myiq2xu™ says:

  26. Venus E. Lee says:

    DAYUM! Dersh has principles:

  27. Venus E. Lee says:

  28. taw46 says:

  29. Cisco says:

    And some people, maybe to many, wonder and ask,”why does anyone need a gun”

  30. Myiq2xu™ says:

  31. lyn says:

    This is funny.

    On Saturday, actor James Woods reached out to alumni of Columbia University, asking for photo evidence that former President Barack Obama actually attended the school. As of this writing, the tweet received over 35,000 likes and was shared over 14,000 times.

    “Hey, if any of you went to Columbia University and recall Barack Obama as a student there, would you please respond with a tweet and a pic of him at Columbia? Thanks,” he tweeted.

  32. Myiq2xu™ says:

  33. Myiq2xu™ says:

  34. Myiq2xu™ says:

  35. Dora says:

  36. Dora says:

    • helenk3 says:

      Stormy was an admitted prostitute, did not claim to be oh so moral while lying like a cheap rug, and she is better looking

Comments are closed.