The other day President Donald Trump shocked the political world by committing a crime so audacious and brazen that a stunned NYT posted an accurate headline on their front page! Trump committed a theft on live television! With the whole world watching, Trump stole the Democrats’ wubbie. While he was at it, he may have stolen the 2020 election too.
This wasn’t the first time that Trump engaged in larceny of something belonging to the Democrats. Back in November 2016, he snatched the presidency away from Hillary Clinton, along with all her hopes and dreams. He has never apologized or shown any remorse for turning the former First Lady, Senator, and Secretary of State into a sad, shambling drunk who now spends her days wandering aimlessly thru the woods outside Chappaqua New York.
Ever since that fateful November evening, millions of Democrats have cried themselves to sleep at night, clutching their wubbie and reciting the words that gave them comfort: “Trump is a racist, Trump is a racist, Trump is a racist.” The Democrats’ wubbie, or security blanket, is a blanket accusation of racism used to cover tens of millions of people. The wubbie gave the Democrats a sense of comfort, because knowing Trump is a racist is half the battle to defeat him.
Then, last Monday, Trump did something that the Democrats were certain he would not and could not ever do. Trump stood up in front of news cameras and unequivocally denounced racism, bigotry, and white supremacy:
In one voice, our nation must condemn racism, bigotry, and white supremacy. These sinister ideologies must be defeated. Hate has no place in America. Hatred warps the mind, ravages the heart, and devours the soul.
And just like that, the Democrats’ wubbie was gone.
In response, Democrats pitched a fit. “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooo!!!!!!!” they shrieked with one voice. The NYT’s editorial staff was so stunned that they published a headline that read “Trump Urges Unity vs. Racism”. Outraged Democrats bombarded the NYT with tweets, emails and phone calls until the paper changed the headline to “Assailing Hate But Not Guns” for later editions.
The head of the Democrat party tweeted this:
Other Democrats rushed out to protect their snowflake constituents by beginning the process of altering reality:
The news media implemented a nationwide “prevent defense” to protect the nation’s voters by preventing them from hearing Trump’s hurtful words. It remains to be seen how successful they were.
Can you imagine the chaos and carnage that would result if the general public believed that Trump wanted to unify the nation in opposition to racism? Oh, the humanity!